Black Moon

.my thoughts.

2011-08-13T18:58:00.000-07:00

Maybe I am on a slow descent to insanity or maybe its just some small hope that I have to actually communicate with a real person.

Once again I am stuck on one of those dark phases. I can't seem to understand why I get them since I'm completely normal and usually happy but when these phases come along I turn into this little gloomy suicidal child.

Thinking of seeking professional
help or some medication for this. I'd rather not bother my partner with such a thing. I've tried once, but it seemed that the burden was just too much for him. Though I've heard that most treatments just make the condition worse.

I am emotionally in pain for no apparent reason and hardly enjoying anything at all. I feel extremely unmotivated and neglected. I can't sleep in peace with all the disturbed thoughts in my head. I've been desperately searching for people or someone to hear me out and tell me its okay. Sadly, the people I yearn to share these thoughts with have either changed or just plain to busy and regarding the people who do want to talk and pretend to listen, just want their hidden agenda s fulfilled

Only now have I realized that having someone offer a shoulder to cry on and ears to listen with is in itself such a wonderful privellege to have.

I just want this horrid pain to go away...

.......................Is anyone there?
Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone

.WEEK ONE.

2011-04-08T13:09:00.000-07:00

~~I must be crazy~~. Kept all my 3 jobs and still went to school and on an 80% course load at that. Not even through week one and the worrisome part is that I'm not even remotely tired yet. Its like, something really bad is about to happen... or something like that.

Just like back in the Philippines, its really really hot out then suddenly... typhoon!

.trying to do everything sucks.

2011-03-14T14:31:00.001-07:00

Here I am on my free time, calling numerous people about some government paper work, scheduling money transfers, and trying to budget just a few hours before another 8 hour shift.

I've begun to feel extremely weak and sleepy nowadays. Signs that tell me I need to quit doing something if I want to go on living.

I never realized till now that I can no longer walk normally, my walking pace would usually be a jogging pace. Whenever I would force myself to walk slowly, I tend to go faster without wanting to. Its like every being of my body is bent on being constantly stressed out. And when I try to have a relaxing day to myself, I get depressed by the fact that I'm not doing anything productive. What's that all about? Even I don't know.

After reading my earliest posts from back then, I felt incredibly silly and nostalgic. Which is why despite my embarrassing naive posts, I will keep them (I think it might be my way of keeping my old self alive, maybe she can make me remember how to have fun...).

2011-03-07T21:39:00.000-08:00

After 2 straight weeks of working non-stop and I finally get two days to myself. This working madness has been this way even right after I graduated from high school. Today I realized that I'm at my limit. I can't juggle 3 jobs and school at the same time anymore, I can feel my body (and mind?!) slowly and painfully giving up on me. I need to get accustomed to a normal life, which is hard for me since when I'm alone with my thoughts and nothing to do, I get really depressed as my mind drifts to thoughts of my family back home and how I can't be of any help to them at the moment. I can only hope that someday they would be able to understand my actions.

Finally away from my mom and most of my self righteous family ("blood-relatives"). I get to think for myself. It was incredibly scary at first, every decision that I made felt like it was still being scrutinized by my family. Fortunately for me, I've got myself a very supportive Sergey. So I've come to gain a little confidence in myself (still not quite there yet).

Lots of things have happened in just a short span of a year. Found myself a real family, and I'm very happy about that. I've actually started to take initiative for most of my responsibilities.

.yay!.

2010-08-27T20:51:00.000-07:00

Hurray for my fist laptop.
Its the most expensive thing that I own and bought with my own money...
really happy! hopefully I'll be able to blog more (though nobody reads it).

.missing those carefree days.

2010-07-21T22:39:00.000-07:00

reading my old posts sure make me feel like reliving those carefree days.. where the only thing you have to worry about is either:

-submitting your homework on time (doesn't necessarily mean you have to do it right. haha!)
-trying to have enough food for everyone to leech on
-staying away from those who harbor ill feelings towards you

you don't get paid to go to school, rather, you pay them.... and still its worth going to...

mood swings suck by the way... no one ever reads this blog.... but i have to vent out my thoughts somewhere.. since i'm too lazy to do anything handwritten.

*sighs* what am I to do?

.in canada.

2009-11-11T20:24:00.000-08:00

well... nobody looks at this blog~
but now that i have internet.. i shall take advantage of it...

so.. now.. for those who didnt know... (which is by the way.. a lot of people)
I AM NOW IN CANADA~
not that anyone would care to know though...
although if by any chance someone actually wondered where i am...
well.. now you know.

hmmm... so.. if i worked for Jollibee just a month ago... now I work for McDonald's (isn't that weird?)
for some reason... i find myself... incredibly addicted to work.
although i love school (and a few of the people there...apparently, i love work more)
my english and grammar is dying (which is ironic because i'm supposed to be more fluent in english by now, especially because of my environment).

i miss my friends and ex-co workers...
sadly... the money i'm making now isnt enough (for my family that is)
and as of now, i am a free loader (for my mom's relatives)

hmmm.. for some reason ... i just ran out of things to say.
oh well...

.allergy.

2009-03-19T06:23:00.000-07:00

sneezing like heck again.* Gyah! I hate it when this happens. I can't get anything done.
I'm looking at the pics from tribute to parents right now. Gawd.... I Look really stupid.

oh and. CONGRATS TO BATCH OF 2009 (we're finally graduating!)
I got two awards
-Catechist of the Year (only 3 people get this)
-Outstanding Glee Club Member (Only I get this~)

I'm sooo proud.... but I was kinda hoping for a merit too... (damn math sumabit nanaman...)

sayang....

bai bai~ I'll go play digimon/ jam legend right now.♥

.i hate tagalog.

2009-02-18T07:32:00.000-08:00

I hate making scripts in tagalog...

Gyaaaaah! I have to do the scripts for chapters 32 to 34...

its short i know. but still.... ITS IN TAGALOG!

so hard to understand....

Fight Puyat Brigade!!!

woot.

2009-02-17T06:54:00.000-08:00

I am actually beginning to feel tired of always staying up late.
I hate waking up when I don't feel like it.
I become immune to the sound of any type of alarm clock (If the world was in chaos, I probably wouldn't notice).
I like sleeping during lunch time.
I think any surface is comfortable as long as I fall asleep.
I'M ALWAYS asleep in my service. ( I like the bouncy and dizzying motion of the bus)
Dont place me near windy places or I'll sleep right away.

I WANT TO SLEEP.

awwww...

2009-02-13T09:14:00.000-08:00

Mom just killed the rat that has been driving her paranoid.....
It s not because our house is dirty (mom is OC with keeping things clean, thats why the rat drove her nuts) its because, beside our house is this very grassy area (and rats live there).

I thought that chasing after it was fun...
BUT!
I didnt like it when mom killed it.
I didnt say anything because I didnt know what to say...
if the rat lived, it would still be running around the dirty kitchen all night
now that it died. we'll more benefits for us humans.
I still feel bad for the rat.

RIP rat~

kill that dog!!!

2009-02-10T08:47:00.000-08:00

I want to murder my neighbor's dog right now...

Its barking.... and howling repeatedly.... and its 12 50 in the morning!!!
I never thought that someday I would have murderous thoughts towards a dog...
Gyah! How am i supposed to concentrate on my IP?????!!!!

I will kiiiiillll you dog!!! Shut Up!

GYAH!

my head hurts

2009-02-09T09:22:00.000-08:00

I am now officially "sleep deprived"...

I"m still doing my stewpid IP. I hate it. A HOLE LOT.

gyah!!!

TOP

2009-02-08T05:43:00.000-08:00

gyah!

People kept on talking about MMORPG stuff a while ago and i actually felt that i miss playing Tales OF Pirates. So I'm downloading it right now. I can't wait to play again~

Must join the rebirth crusade!!!
Oh. I have a pet now. They used to be soooo expensive like... 500 points or something. now, they're only 9 points!!! yaaaaay~♥
None of you prolly know what I'm talking about since I'm the only person playing TOP in the whole ST. Scho area.
Haha. I remember this quest called "HEX QUEST"

You have to do 6 steps ata or was it 7?
oh well...
You get 10 000 exp points for every task. So I boosted 3(!) levels instantly~
ah. someone i know should play this too.... its boring talking about things only I know...

oh well...
it was a happy family day~
Thanks Steph!!! Inna!!! Chris!!! & Brian!!!
(And the Cheng Family~)

Goodnight everyone. Get some rest.

hmmm...

2009-01-26T04:37:00.000-08:00

My week is still fully loaded.... I hate it.

I wan to sleep normally again!

oh well....

I was 0.7 points away from a merit ^^;;; oh well... may 4th quarter pa naman di ba???

all for now~

Goodnight to everyone!

my butt hurts...

2009-01-18T00:49:00.000-08:00

I slept on a funny angle today...

I woke up with a very deep pain on my butt...
it hurt so much that i couldnt walk... o_o

saw inna in church today but not Ongkiks (she probably doing her IP in school again... -_-;)

As of now...

I'm finishing my Thesis~♥
My defense will be on tuesdaaaaaaay!!!!
Noooooooo!

oh well....

I didnt get into UP ^^;;;; (I didnt listen to mom when she told me to fill up the other blanks where you had to write the name of another campus and a different course)

*sighs* oh well.... nothing I can do...

very deadly snake

2009-01-17T06:46:00.000-08:00

When I was on my way to the Lion King rehearsals yesterday...

CHRIS FOUND A BRIGHTLY COLORED GREEN SNAKE!

I didnt really take it seriously when the guards told me to stay away... it was so small that i thought it wouldnt even bother biting me ^^

BUT!

it turns out that the snake was an "ulopong" It looks harmless at first because its so small... and it turns out that it has one of the most quickest and deadliest venom. When a person gets bitten by an ulopong. they are paralyzed (so quick that you can't even go "ah!") then they turn black and you drop dead ♥

scary T^T

waaaah!

2009-01-12T06:51:00.000-08:00

Super nervous and extremely worn out right now T^T

Currently (as in right now) Working on...

....my thesis....
....homework in cle....
....gradsong composition....
....lion king parts/songs....
....homework in ELA....
...plushies....

ugh... thats not even half of it....

but oh well.... I've got bigger problems~♥

HI AVYYYYYYYYYY!!! I'LL WRITE TO YOU SOOON~~~~

I just found out that I DID NOT FAIL LA SALLE!!! (woot~~~) oh yeeeeessss~♪

I was just "not accepted" (at the moment) because silly ol' me did not listen to her mother to not get the "quota courses"

Lord God... kind and merciful God..... let me pass UP..... I really took that test seriously~

all for now folks~~~~♥

oh crap...

2009-01-04T05:04:00.000-08:00

T^T so sad...

...I FAILED LA SALLE... (though I get reconsideration)
it sucks, really it does. I feel really bad. And knowing that theres school tomorrow makes it worse & that I need 36 people more to answer my survey... wah... sucky moments in my life...

if I failed la salle then I failed UP (most probably). Lets hope not.

gyahhh...

I will now drown my negative thoughts in busying myself with my IP & thesis.

Survey

2008-12-30T07:21:00.001-08:00

If you are aged 13-19 years and has (a) parent(s) working very far away (not usually around)/OFWs please answer my survey! For my thesis!!!

http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=oD_2fa7xy9VsLYhrBFpzjg4Q_3d_3d part one

http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=I0A_2bCo9wDdBBeVdrfZDEgA_3d_3d part two

please help me graduate. T^T

Merry Christmas!

2008-12-19T02:50:00.000-08:00

Good Evening to whoever is reading this~♥

First Off~
Thank You for the GIfts!~~~

Christine, Steph, & Inna~

Pochi & Denise~

Ongkiks & Xan~

Liezl, Joan, Darlene, Joan, And Ms. Belle~

Have a Safe and VERY MERRY Christmas!!!

its an update!

2008-08-01T07:58:00.000-07:00

*inhales deeply* waaaaaaaaaaah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *panics*
UPCAT on Sunday! (I'm part of the last batch so, its on 12 30 in the afternoon).
Good luck to the people who are taking it tomorrow!
Go Steph & Chris!!! & Inna Too!!!
I wish everyone good luck & judgement!♥

wow... this is my first update in a very long time.....

I'm trying to submit my novel report today... *yawns* i wanna sleep already!

Good LUck to the Seniors! Itayo niyo ang bandila ng mga kulasa!!!

Alive Again~

2008-05-26T02:01:00.000-07:00

Finally got to write in this blog that has been neglected for... quite a while -_-;

Nothing to do...

The weather has been really weird these days, ne?
Suddenly, everything feels so humid/hot then it starts raining like hell.

I saw Chris the other day~ (when I went to St. Scho to meet with our lawyer and enroll)
and I went to Inna's house too~ when I went to youth camp.
There's a funny story of how I found her house.

During a 3 hour break, I texted Inna, letting her know that I'm just around.
Then more texting... then I ran out of load... I ran around the village like an idiot using...
"The green roof" & "A scary tree beside the window" as my clue to finding Inna's house.
Turns out... the house was so close to where I was staying... -_-; haha... well...
I found it anyways... Such a BIG spacious house!!!! Caught up with Inna for a while then went back to camp... (stayed in that place for 2 days~) It rained really hard on the 2nd day... Which was also one of the event in the youth camp which I found extremely interesting~

And... haven't heard from Steph at all...

STEEEEEEEEEPH!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU???? (probably in Japan, still...)

Gawd... is it just me or does it seem like the summer break was just too short?
wah.... Fourth Year.... Unlike last year... I don't really feel much into it.... My best high school year was 2nd year... fun times... uncomplicated times...
I wish I'm in college already... I don't know why... but I'm feeling so impatient....

oh well....

this is all for now everyone... (though I doubt anyone, even looks at this blog anymore)
but what better way to vent frustration than in writting?

sigh

2008-01-15T06:53:00.000-08:00

ah well... A lot has happened and so many "discoveries".

"I'm not angry at you people nor do I hate you" is something that I'd like to make clear of my true intention.

Life is meant to be this way I guess..things probably do happen for a very good reason, huh?
Everyone should be happy now since its finally over ^^ especially particular somebodies..

I'm finally doing my homework *yay~*
I still can't believe our batch will be doing AFRICA for family day -_-"
Last year we we're danced like prostitues... gawd... I don't know which is worse T^T

Okay...

This morning, Me and Christine went to the Bank *laughs* to get Chris' allowance which she forgot to get since she slept in her car ^^,
I also got a gift and an extremely long letter from Avy ^^ (Thank You!~)
I always feel sleepy in Geometry for some reason -_-" its not that I don't have interest in it at all (there are other subjects that are worse) I'm beginning to think that it probably tires my brain more or maybe it because Geom is usually in the afternoon?

Ah well... gotta go to sleep now^^

Oyasumi!

kurisumasu

2007-12-26T07:55:00.000-08:00

Christmas was okay & fun. It was mostly spent in the Narciso Residence (we went home around 3 in the morning!!!) So.... me and josh had lots of time to talk...

and... Since I highly doubt that "he" can convince his parents to be my partner..... I ended up asking Josh as my escort instead.... darn it....

We're almost a year together...but.. *sighs* we still havent got out on a date *laughs*

Anyways... I'm almost finished with everyones plushies. 4 of those I've already sent to my very distant friends ;p But for some reason THREE of them didnt make it... T^T This is what a person gets when you entrust something important to someone who doesnt think its important enough to be remembered. *pout* Anyways... to those I havent given my present to yet... "I'm very sorry"

Ah well...

all for now..

Oyasumi na sai Minna-san *bow*

Happi AC VERSARY!!!!

2007-11-16T05:00:00.000-08:00

Happi AC VeRsArY!!!!!

Happy AC versary to you guys~ (you know who you are)

Unfortunately my mom won't allow me to the outing -_- ah well... I'm already used to things like that....

===Nov 24, 2007===
Hmmm.... I could've sworn I posted the message above...... weird...

Its cards out right now and mom hasn't come to pick me up yet....

I wanna cry right now and its not because of the cards out... (why would I cry if I didn't get a blue slip?) I don't know why... but every fridays and throughout the weekends I start getting irritable. Raging Hormones perhaps? ..... such mystery....

My team in the dabate today lost XD no biggie ^_- Its finally a Friday!!!

I can finally play TOP!!! but first I need to go to the RTC Binan thing... since my dad left without telling anyone who might find the information very vital to them.

It will pass....every problem will pass no matter how bad they turned out to be....

lolness

2007-10-25T21:49:00.000-07:00

Yaaay~~~ I'm in the School Library right now and not much to do XD lol

Chris is On the Comfy Library couch reading...: "Kira-Kira" and some people are busy playing scrabble.

Hmm... so what to say? It was sort of pointless to come to school since I didnt have any sports left to play.. but hey, I came to school anyways.. but kind of late. I also thought that we would be half day since theres not much to do -_-. But no... we're going to get dismissed at 3 30 pm!!!! Evil!

Just finished reading His Dark Materials: The Golden Compass. Its so nice~ I wanna read the second one and the third (of course). and and and mom ish gonna get the FIFTH book of Artemis Fowl!!! yeah! so Happeh ^_-.

Hmmm... so what now?

Mom allowed me to the Holloween Party! *more yay!* But she didnt allow the sleepover thing though. Ah well, Its okay since the earlier I get home guarantees more Internet time for me ^_^.

====November 5, 2007: Monday===
Goodness.. I thought I posted this already -_-" ah well there probably is something wrong with my blog. Gah.... Its already Monday and classes resumed today. I felt bored at first but when it was chemistry..... it was really fun~ I dont think Ehren had the activity yet though....

Hmm... so what did I do for swm-break?

well...

I slept late...

Cut grass....

Already started on my scrapbook since Tuesday....

Ate a lot....

Used the internet...

WENT ON A HAYAO mIYAZAKI films watching spree!!!....

Slept...

Sang at church(in asian hospital every sundays)...

Saw Inna at POwerbooks...

Saw Chris at Rustan's (she woke me up)...

what else? Heh.. I dont remember anymore.

This is all for now. Ja~

more funnehness

2007-10-19T22:07:00.000-07:00

*yay!!!!* Exams are Ovah!!! woot~ *more yay!!!*

We didnt do much in School after exams.. finished the requirements... and then just roamed about in school with the A.C. (some of them from time to time ^^")

Oh and yesterday was a fun fun day in the afternoon. We played Futsal (Like Hell We Did!!!!!) it was Me, Rica, Sabs, and Mariel against SIR ANTON, TAMMY, and Krizia (Crissy, lol). It was hard to get a goal on the other team since there was no escaping Tammy's "Love Gate" (lolness) and and and Sir Anton.......GIGGLES!!!!! meh and Rica heard it O_o yep it was a weird thing to hear from a guy XP everytime sir had the ball he would giggle.. and then he GRUNTS!!! when he doesnt get the ball.... the many musical sound of Sir Anton... yeah...

I found a new talent!!! I can kill a fly with a fly swatter real quick!!!!! such a nice talent.. bet not much people can do that. lol.

Hmm... theres something wrong with blogspot... my posts dont come up whenever I post them.. I just get surprised to find that I havent posted anything and would usually find my finished post in the draft category.

and... what else.. had a hilarious episode in front of the faculty room ;3 Yep... that would go into my unforgettable high school memories ^.^" embarrassing yes, but hey, we (Me, Steph and Chris) had a good laugh right after. The sulked about in our respective sulking corners of negativity.

I keep on forgetting on what to talk about....... yeah.. so.... I have no Idea what to say....... I'll try to come up with something later...... yep yep... *random thought* Our feastday ish tomorrow!!! yeah! I hope Steph brings a coupla of mangas teh read ^.^

I started reading "His Dark Materials: The Golden Compass" again... Its kind of boring at first and some parts... but hey I really turned out to be an interesting book.

And I started playing Tales Of Pirates again!!! yeah!!!! even if it still has a few glitches... its still okay... And theres a Halloween Event going on so... rare items are out and they set double exp days ^.^ So its going to be a little easier to level up. When you reach lvl 40 and up... it going to be hard to lvl up.... you have to be a crazy person to even reach lvl 60!!!! ----___---- gah.....

ah well this is all for now..

Ja~

so funneh~

2007-10-05T07:53:00.000-07:00

So funneh these videos XDDDD so fun to watch ;3 I like the coke in can incident ~

"Coke in Can Incident"

Narration: I think we just finished laughing about something and then Steph moved my hand (the one with the canned coke) then it hit Inna square on the noseXD lolness~ Then you would hear us laughing our asses off~ and if pay attention you just might see a really funny panic face mode of Steph~ XDD

"Oops Steph Did It Again"

Narration: Steph was taking a random vid of the people who were coming in the bus. Yep and it the last part you'd hear her say "Oops..." In a funny way. Hay Nakuu~ Steph never fails to make me laugh XD Thanks Steph.

All these videos were taken from Steph's blog and the videos were also taken by Steph~

double double post

2007-09-25T08:08:00.000-07:00

double double post, yeah!!!!

still working on Macbeth since I have no idea how to summarize the summary part (heh) no body tell steph her picture is posted 'ere >///< I am so gonna die (aside from shes my diagonal seat mate) I like Macbeth better than Hamlet speaking of which... I was proof reading my Novel Report when I noticed that at some points Macbeth's name was replaced with "Hamlet". So much killing both in Hamlet and in Macbeth......

I had this dream nga pala~ it was: I was Macbeth... in a checkered scottish castle..... outside ...there were wood/tree things moving.... then I shot one with a burning arrow.... each tree that got hit became a squirrel ( o__O).... okay ....

I made my first plushie today!!! yeah!!! I named it the "Steph Sprite" since it looks like those leaf sprites from Shaman King only purple and it also resembles an onion at one point XD lolness XDDD

the lizards in my house are soooooo FAT ang they look pregnant~ heh at least they keep the bugs away...

there was this slug..... I sprinkled salt on it... it bloated up.... and became uber slimeh XP

ja~

2007-09-25T07:54:00.000-07:00

TO AVY~

since you finally resurrected out of the unknown...

kyu~

and....

lolness~ I'll try to write to ya tomorrow ;3

2007-09-22T06:05:00.000-07:00

I want a new layout for my blog -_- with music this time I hope and not too black or anything and has a really big space for posting and has to have and archive thingy with a nice cbox XD

So i'm working on my novel report right now.... while mom and anton are watching TV. Sabs didn't text me to come to her house, she just said that she was on her way here or something... gyah... what happened Sabs????? Yeah... so... what else....

I can never seem to finish the recent art for Steph for some reason.... I need inspiration or something!!!! wah... field trip is coming up.. and the week is fully loaded with activities... yay (?)

hmm.... only three people visit my blog XD lol. not that it matters~ Its not like the world is going to end if no one visits my blog or anything ^.^

I want to go to sleep.. but I have a novel report to finish... I'm just here updating as a stress relief~ yep.. it sure works for me sometimes.... I become very restless if i cant write about something....

yeah.... *random thought* last friday.. the FUTSAL club BEAT the VOLLEYBALL club in a VOLLEYBALL game XPPP haha the Futsal club needs a name change~ maybe next time the FUTSAL club will have a FUTSAL game against the VOLLEYBALL club~ lol XP

;333333 Ja~

lolz~

2007-09-18T07:57:00.000-07:00

yea so XD Went to the derma XD got poked on the dace again by sharp objects XDDD this is all for now XDDDD gyeh.... what a lame post~

lalala~ there goes the rain....

2007-09-11T04:23:00.000-07:00

haha XD I think I know why its been raining so hard XD I sang thats why ~~~

In the library...

"So-so game" and the "A.C. Seafood Song" XDDD was fun XD

"Slippery fish, slippery fish, swimming in the water...
slippery fish, slippery fish... gulp gulp - OH NOES!!!
It got swallowed by an-----

Octopus, octopus, swimming in the water...
Octopus, Octopus.... gulp gulp- OH NOES!!!!
It got swallowed by a----

Humpback whale, humpback whale, swimming in the water...
Humpback whale, humpback whale... gulp gulp- OH NOES!!!!
It got swallowed by a----

Great White Shark, great white shark, swimming in the water..
great white shark, great white shark... gulp gulp- OH NOES!!!
It got swallowed by----

Stephanie, stephanie, skating on the water...
stephanie, stephanie..... gulp gulp- OH NOES!!!
She got swallowed by----

I~nna, I~nna, chasing Mello on the water..
I~nna, I~nna.. gulp gulp_ OH NOES!!!

this is all I came up with so far XDDD

haha I laykee this song XD "A.C. Nursery Rhymes"

Ja Ne~~~

gyah...

2007-09-09T09:05:00.000-07:00

What a complicated life we all live in, huh?

But hey the reason why I hate really emo people is because.... "Life is Hard" yea everyone knows that... but its not really a reason to sulk around, mope, or mutilate yourself... Make the best of all the bad things that happen to you. Thats one of the best things in this life... just when you're starting to believe that you;re all alone and your life has no meaning or whatever emo thoughts you have in mind... Try being happy.. cause there could be a person who had problems worse than yours XD So stop bein all emo XD Some people become emo just because its some sort of fad or... whatever XD

Did I just rant?????? I'm not sure if thats called ranting all I know is I just gave out a random piece of my mind XD

I finally know how to play "Departure" and "Her Most Beautiful Smile" both from Samurai X. And I'm trying to play "Koi Da Ne" from Howl's Moving Castle! AND I wanna have Howl!!!! He's so filled with hotness!!!!!! *I'm gonna melt* Sexy voice actor too~~~ Please never show me or let me know the age of his voice actor or I'm gonna murder you. Gaah~~ He's so... shmexy XDDD haha Yeah I wanna have him XDDD

ah well... Its 12 fifiteen in the morning and mom placed pigtails on meh XDD haha yeah that was a random thought too~~~

Hmmm.. so theres this problem among friends thats been going on these days, ne?

yep....

2007-09-03T04:22:00.000-07:00

*sigh* she does hate me.. I'm not sure why though.. but I do hope its not a really grave one to the point that she has to put whats left of our friendship behind her because of whatever she thinks I did... Gabe says I shouldn't go all depressed about it.. But I think my case is different probably because we used to be really good friends and it hurts just thinking all that friendship had just gone to waste.

ah well enough of that already XDDD As of now I'm actually reviewing for CLE T^T the typhoon hit the philippines hard to the point that they had to suspend classes so now the teachers are trying to reach their deadlines and as students we're trying to cram up all the knowledge we're supposed to have by now XD

I feel like this week should be called "memorize and study to death week" and the week after this should be called "Judgement week" (cards out! oh noes.... .O___O. )

Thanks to Inna by the way for always keeping me company every dismissal XD And thanks for Steph's extreme patience with me ^_^( I wub yoo Steph~~~~) Thanks for Christine who has just witnessed Steph's doppelganger with me this morning(and for keeping me company till assembly) XD

Gyah...T^T I miss avy..... I know! I shall send her a message through friendster ! Whenever i actually manage to have a lot of time in my hands XD

ah well.... Okay about the picture above XD Its Inna, Chris, Mariel, Sabs, Rica, Doe, Xan, Arielle, Gabe, and oh so joyful me ^.^ Its our gimmick at ATC!!!! (Steph you should've been there!!!!) Got there by getting a ride through Gabe's bus (me, inna, chris, and gabe). We. Slept, Listened to Random iPods, Slept again, got chased by dogs, hitchhiked (well kinda...), slept again, got butt cramps, sang random songs, was taken to unknown routes XDDD, finally got to ATC, ate at California Pizza Kitchen (I hate that place aside from its unreasonably expensive.. I really hate that place), split up (some went windowshopping for clothes some went to Datablitz, I'm one of 'em), Met up at timezone and had a lot of fun, got so tired, waited for Rica's Parents to pick us up at starbucks, had fun in a really cramped car (seriously it was fun ;333) , they dropped me off to my house then the rest had a sleep over ('xept for Inna)

I went rock climbing yesterday XD gawd my arms hurt so much more this morning than they did yesterday T^T I mean I wiegh 60 kg!!!! i had to put all that weight to my arms!!!!! It was kinda fun though XD

Our group was talking about going to Cebu or something XD I think it started when Rica mentioned something about attending a cousin's wedding at Cebu 8D. Then there was some random discussion about.... I forgot.... -_-

this is all for now XD ^_^ the only reason why I updated this was because... there was this statement that kept on ringing in my head "Why dont you update your blog???" the question was so taunting that it was bothering me while I was studying -_-"

so this is about it.. I wonder how long this will turn out ?

*~*Ja Ne! *~*

2007-06-10T22:03:00.000-07:00

>///< its spring here in canada. (I'm gettin spring allergies *sniffles*) Just got back from victoria island. I also managed to copy the class list from my classmates blogs. I'm a little bit disappointed XD heh^^ I guess i got used to Eli. I love Eli T^T Wai cant it stay that way???? Ah well ^^. Cant do much about that now, eh?

Waaah XDDDDDD no internet at mai grandparent's place theres not even a computer in sight

-___- man this sucks.... hell yeah.. I wanna watch "Surfs Up" (OMG... PENGUIIIIINS!!!!!!)

Goin to the states tomorrow. with mai uncle roland and aunt sonia.

:sigh: only a few more days and I'm back to the philippines....

Yay CLASSES!!

Yep you heard me right, I really REALLY prefer school than home.

I dont mind my classmates or teachers crappy mood..

or the pressure, As long as I'm in school ^^ I'm a very happy person^^

GAwd i Miss PERCY T___T *cry cry* The temporary caretaker told us that my dear pug fainted in the village park on the third day of our stay here in canada.

I wanted to go home and just bring mai pug along ^^. But no.. the friggin airport has to keep him in some sort of quarantine seven days before the flight.... grrrr.... Anyways.. I dont think percy can handle the cold here ^^. Ah well.. the first thing I'm gonna do is Hug mai pug when i get home.

As of now.. I am carelessly babysitting mai cousins (and brother *rolls eyes*): BRian (11), Antonio(11), Alyssa (8), Kyle (5), and william (3). O_____O Waw... And right now.. all hell has broken loose in this very tiny room, where pillows and dvd casing are scattered everywhere.

This seems long enough.. I think... ^^ a well *shrugs* thats it then ^^

2007-05-29T23:26:00.000-07:00

Yay~~~~ Thank gawd its spring here canada ^^. It snowed the other day in alberta *double yay*

----> this was supposedly a post made on march 29, 2007 that i was never able to post~

2007-04-01T08:20:00.000-07:00

sigh.. school is finally over... I'm really gonna miss it.. lol. I really hate fridays and summer breaks T^T . Yep.. i do prefer school . yea.. i know I'm wierd.. but hey theres nothing i can do about it. i guess its okay to say anything random and stupid now since nobady actually reads my blog cause its been outdated for too long ^^

The Piccie above is my first successful edited drawing. Yeah!!! I finally learned how to thicken the outlines by myself ^^ so proud of myself right now ^^.

2007-03-19T08:51:00.000-07:00

Ok so I've done a little changing to.. Ouran!!!La lng ^^

2006-09-15T05:46:00.000-07:00

Halo people.. sorry it took such a long time for me to post something. I just didnt have the time.

Okay, so today the class advisers distributed the merits. NAturally it would be the end of the world on the day when i would be the one accepting that peice of paper that proves that you're actually smart.....
Oh yeah i still love itachi.... today was also as Christine would call it "the day of reckoning..." in other words "Cards Out Day" (a.k.a. Judgement Day) I am not satisfied with my grades so far.. its really bad....

2006-08-25T04:20:00.000-07:00

It was dismissal time when I walked my usual way to my school service which wasnt there that time ....
I passed by the blue school bus with non-tinted windows that made me sigh and reflect on the memories I used to have... I missed having that person around...

Oh well

2006-08-21T06:27:00.000-07:00

Sore Ga Ai Deshou? (is this Love?)

2006-07-14T03:48:00.000-07:00

He was always there... Especially on Fridays...

As I walked down the long flight of stairs silently leaving my friends behind I caught a glimpse of a guy wearing a La Sallian P.E. uniform through the stairway window. I would usually see him there but now I suddenly felt wierd. I tried to shake off the feeling but it didnt come off... I was sitting in my school bus trying to arrange my things . then after that i let out a sigh of exhaustion while sitting down. He went to my brother (who was also in the school service at that time) ...then i saw him... I suddenly felt a lump starting to build up in my throat. He was talking with my bro when i was slowly trying to exit the school service unnoticed. After I finally got out without being noticed . I tried looking for my friends The I saw him again along the sidewalk , this time he looked at me and smiled....

I still feel like fainting though.... my god someone help me.....

This story isnt for me!!!! I made it for someone else.... whom you might never guess who...Its dedicated to someone I know who is at the moment not studying in this School any longer. I only saved it as it is cause my mom was coming so i had to close the computer. Besides I am not yet done!!!

I Love Rainy DAys

2006-07-12T02:03:00.000-07:00

Right now I'm Wearing a white ribbon around my neck. Why? Because I just feel like it!!! :sigh: we were dismissed During a Very Loooooooong test with Sir. Gene. :sighs agian: the font color is starting to hurt my eyes.... I have to find a way to change that cross cursor..... even though the class was dismissed At one pm. The only students who may leave are the people who have their buses ready outside.

Christine is sad since the staff cut Bob but we found Bob's brother, Bobby!!!!

HAaay.... Oh yah :remembers: My groupmates for the bulletin board randomly painted the bulletin board. Hmm... I'm Hungry so wait a minute....

2006-07-07T08:02:00.000-07:00

Nakakainis!!!! Talaga and you tube palaging bitin!!!! Kainis!!!! Makes want to bang the computeR!!! I am attempting to watch DNAngel since I've been dying to watch it so much. AHH!! it still wont load properly. Youtube is too slow and vnl lacks episodes HAAAAYYY....... I really need to find a good anime downloading site!!!

My life at the moment

2006-07-07T05:07:00.000-07:00

Wow! such a hectic day. So much to do and so much to memorize. Like the one with had to present in Sir Gene's (pronounced "Jean").

To The Man I Married
by Angela MAnalang Gloria

To the man i married
I cannot love you with a love that outcompares the boundless sea for that were false, as no such love and no such ocean can ever be

But i can love you with a love as finite as the waves that dies and dying, holds from crest to crest the blue of everlasting skies

And May.....
By the same author

April came and April went
through a magic crystal wheather
now with mischievious intent
pan and i will walk together
lean and hold your breath and say
softly from a jasmine bower
we have caught the fairy may
cant you see her in this flowers

The Authors husband as heard it... died of kicking a bucket

Boredom makes me do idiotic things...

2006-07-07T03:23:00.000-07:00

Haaaay.... so much preassure in school... for some reason I think the A.C. is mad at me or simply had no more interest in me since I'm always gone due to the big preparation for the St. Benedict Feastday thing. I wonder what Sr. Regina's surprise for everyone.... I miss Avy... I miss St. Paul and the insanity thats building up over there. I miss JCS (Jabez Christian School) which is the school where I learned the true concept of "Friendship". A word I'm starting to find difficult to define since ALL the people I'm so close to keeps on moving away or betrays me or hangs out with someone else or... haay.. the list is too long for me to say.

I feel so bad for my teamates in Homeroom ( Kurisuchin, Ina, Anjuri, and Erika ). Because of me we are about to get a minus five in something. Gawd... There are so many assignments that I didnt have time to fix the bulletin board. But still the rest should have at least done something since I already gave them a concept on how the bulletin board should be. Still Why Do I Feel So Bad? So many meetings for me to attend each day. Glee Club, Theatre Guild (The "Entablado" or the writers guild cause Ms. Kathy keeps on calling the guild that), and chorale singing.

I'm chatting with Katrina Evangilista right now and sharing random anime pictures. ^_^ I have to go to gaia now so I can dress up my dream avatar...

J A N E . . .

2006-07-05T06:05:00.000-07:00

Just....... Began...

.....Its not over yet.........

For Avy...

For me....

A pretty image to see you guys smile ^_^

Can You Contain You Laughter?

2006-07-05T06:02:00.000-07:00

Well?

........For The A.C. ....................

Ah... Atsui Desu... (its hot)

2006-07-05T05:08:00.000-07:00

If you play gaia... Help me look like this...

2006-07-05T04:45:00.000-07:00

Its me and finally i get to post my pic hehehe...